As I grew older I started to take more and more control of our lives, managing everything from my school enrolments and medical forms to what we were to eat and where we lived. Ultimately this burden took its toll on every part of my life including my relationship with my mum. I developed Post Traumatic Stress Disorder and Major Depression and began disassociating by the time I was 13. Only to became suicidal by the time I was 15. I tried repeatedly to get help from my school, family, authorities and the mental health teams but was turned away. Only 5 minutes out of my plan to end my life I realised my life was the only thing I had that could only be damaged by my situation if I let it.... so over an 8 month period I focused on how to win back everything I had lost.
I have been working on this ever since. By far the most beneficial improvement was counselling, which I got from Arafmi WA. I finally found a place that believed me! Through counselling I developed self-worth again. I finally started to admit that I was angry at a lot of people and situations in my past. I also started to set boundaries with my mother, friends and family.
So now I am a happy and alive young woman. I am studying psychology at university and I work full time in the field of mental health. Working on issues relating to being a COPMI carer is something I may always have to work on however, I am focusing on who I am, not what the illness has done to me. And my mum and I are working on a relationship separate to that which is caused by her illness. I still feel like her parent but that is only one part of my life now.